To the boy who has my heart.

To the boy who has my heart. Thank you. You’ve had my heart since I was five and you were six and I had the biggest crush on you. You crushed my heart then when you moved across town, only to be seen during school hours. Thank you. You reminded my heart what it felt like to skip a beat when I was twelve and you were thirteen and all I wanted was to be the one who was in love. You hurt me with feelings for another, more perfect girl. Thank you. You stole every piece of my mind and heart at thirteen when you moved down the street from me. You became my best friend. My go to. The boy I was in love with. You tormented me as you fell in love with another. Thank you. You stole every thought, every heartbeat, every fear, every pain away when I was fifteen and you were almost sixteen. You love my broken, shattered pieces and it amazes me. You love the pieces of me I absolutely hate. You love me when I can’t even look in the god damn mirror. Thank you. Please be careful with me.. I’m fragile, damaged, one wrong move and I may not survive. Be fragile with me for all of the times I can’t be for myself. Thank you.. I love you. I always have and always will.

Your average teenager.

I have a tendency to be a little bit sassy when it comes to my mother..especially when it involves her trying to tell me what to do. I suppose that would be your typical teenage girl, but my darlings, Times have appeared to change. In my house I am considered a “bad kid”  when in reality I am a goody two shoes. You see, unlike your average fifteen year old, I am a virgin. I have never had any form of drug or alcohol in me (except medically prescribed.) I have never cut a single class and pull As and Bs. I don’t sneak out, look at porn, and I work hard to make my family proud. I am far from good and am absolutely not trying to sound self righteous or anything. I know that I am hard to deal with, home way more than I should be, and emotionally unstable, but I am trying..and that’s all we can do, right?